How Do I Grow in My Faith?

You have been a Christian for a while now. Long enough that the beginner material feels like it is written for someone else, and not long enough that you feel like you have arrived anywhere in particular. You read your Bible, mostly. You pray, sometimes. And you have a nagging sense that this is supposed to be going somewhere, that faith is supposed to grow, and yours seems to be idling.

If that is you, welcome to the most common stage of the Christian life and the one with the least written about it. Here is what growth actually looks like, and how it happens.

What does it mean to grow in faith?

Not knowing more, though knowledge is part of it. Not feeling more, though feeling comes and goes. Growth in Scripture is always described as becoming more like Jesus.

Paul says the goal is that we "attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ" (Ephesians 4:13 ESV). The measure is a person. You are growing if, over years, you are becoming more patient, more honest, more generous, less anxious, less easily offended, and more able to love people who are hard to love.

That is slower and more ordinary than most of us hoped. It is also more measurable than it sounds. Ask someone who has known you for five years whether you are different. That is the test.

Why does my faith feel stuck?

A few reasons show up over and over.

You are consuming rather than practicing. Sermons, podcasts, books, and articles like this one are inputs, and inputs alone never grew anyone. James says to be doers of the word and not hearers only, and warns that hearing without doing is a kind of self deception. If you have been taking in a great deal and changing very little, this is likely the reason.

You are alone. Growth happens in friction with other people, and a private faith has nothing to push against. Most spiritual plateaus are actually relational plateaus.

You have stopped being honest. Somewhere there is a habit, a resentment, or a compromise you have stopped bringing to God, and the line goes quiet around it. Confession restarts things faster than any new discipline.

Or you are simply in a dry season, and nothing is wrong. Farmers do not panic in winter. Keep doing the ordinary things and wait for the ground to thaw.

What are the spiritual disciplines?

The word discipline puts people off, so think of them as the habits that put you where God tends to work. None of them earn anything. They position you.

Scripture, read slowly. Not to finish but to be shaped. A chapter a day, sat with, will change you more than a year read in a hurry. If you want a method, How Do I Start Reading the Bible? lays one out.

Prayer, especially the honest kind. Bring the real thing, not the presentable version. Growth stalls fastest when prayer becomes performance.

Silence. Ten minutes with nothing playing. This is the discipline modern life fights hardest, and it may be the one that matters most.

Fasting. Going without food for a set time to sharpen hunger for God. Jesus assumed His followers would do it and gave instructions for how.

Community. A small group of people who know your actual life and are permitted to say hard things to you. This is not optional, however introverted you are.

Service. Doing something for someone who cannot repay you, regularly. Self focus is the enemy of growth, and service is its most reliable cure.

Generosity. Giving money in a way that costs something. Jesus said your heart follows your treasure, which means giving is a way to move your heart on purpose.

Sabbath. One day a week of stopping. Rest is a command, not a reward, and refusing it is a quiet way of saying you are more necessary than God.

You do not need all eight tomorrow. Pick the one you are most avoiding. That is usually the one you need.

How do I build a habit that lasts?

Small, anchored, and boring.

Small means a size you can do on your worst day. Fifteen minutes beats an hour you skip. Anchored means attached to something you already do, so it borrows the strength of an existing routine: coffee, the commute, the walk. Boring means you stop expecting it to feel meaningful every time. Most days it will feel like brushing your teeth. That is not failure. That is what practice feels like from the inside.

Removing the daily decision helps more than motivation ever will. Some of the women in our community keep the devotional from that month's Womens Box on the table so the morning already has a shape when they sit down, though a Bible left open on the counter does the same job. Either way, decide once instead of every day.

Then expect to fail and plan for it. You will miss a week. The people who grow are not the ones who never miss. They are the ones who come back without a long detour through guilt.

What growth actually feels like

Mostly it feels like nothing, and then one day you notice.

You notice that a comment which would have wounded you for a week barely registered. That you prayed for someone who hurt you and meant it. That a verse came to mind in a hard moment without being summoned. That you are less afraid of things you used to be afraid of. These are the fruit, and fruit grows quietly on branches that were simply staying attached. Abiding and growing are the same thing seen from two angles.

Paul describes the fruit of the Spirit as "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control" (Galatians 5:22 and 23 ESV). Notice it is fruit, not produce. Nobody manufactures it. It appears on a life that has stayed close to the source.

The long way is the only way

Our culture wants transformation in a weekend, and the Christian life is not built that way. Peter writes, "But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ" (2 Peter 3:18 ESV), and grow is a farming word, not a factory word. It takes seasons. It cannot be rushed, and it cannot be skipped.

So stop measuring by the week. Measure by the decade. Read the chapter, say the honest prayer, sit in the quiet, show up to the group, serve the person, give the money, take the rest. Do these things when they feel like nothing, because they are working when they feel like nothing.

If you want people to walk with you in it, our mentors exist for exactly this stage. You are not stuck. You are in the middle, and the middle is where most of the growing happens.

With love,
Elise

A few questions people ask

How do I grow spiritually as a Christian?

Through practices that position you where God works: slow Scripture reading, honest prayer, silence, fasting, community, service, generosity, and rest. Growth is measured by becoming more like Jesus over years rather than by knowledge or feelings.

Why does my faith feel stagnant?

Usually because you are consuming teaching without practicing it, growing alone rather than in community, or avoiding honesty with God about something specific. Sometimes it is simply a dry season, and the answer is to keep the ordinary habits and wait.

What are the main spiritual disciplines?

Bible reading, prayer, silence and solitude, fasting, fellowship, service, giving, and Sabbath rest. They do not earn God's favor; they place you where His grace tends to do its work.

How long does spiritual growth take?

A lifetime. Scripture uses farming language for growth, which means seasons rather than weeks. The most reliable sign of growth is that people who have known you for years can see you becoming more patient, honest, and loving.